Friday, May 11, 2012

Have You Seen It?

Because I think every parenting blog and website I occasionally swing by is talking about this right now.  And I haven't talked breastfeeding at in you in a while, so here's my two cents.  Just in case you were wondering.

1.  I hate the title.  How dare a magazine say that?  As if you aren't "Mom enough" if you decide not to practice extended breastfeeding or attachment parenting.  Aren't parents constantly second guessing themselves without media like this?

2.  The cover is posed to look slightly sexy, which bothers me.  You have a very made-up, skinny, super attractive woman posing while nursing.  And they are both looking at the camera.  I really doubt that's how most people who practice extended breastfeeding look on a daily basis.  Breastfeeding isn't about sex or sexuality.  It's about nourishing your baby.  Can't we try to portray breastfeeding realistically? 

3.  I also know that TIME is trying to get attention and sell magazines.  And they got my attention, which never happens.  So in that aspect, they did a good job on their cover.

4.  I am a proponent of breastfeeding.  Maybe it's not for everyone, but it makes sense for us. I feel that it is better nutritionally for my babe, she loves nursing,  and hey, it's cheaper than formula.  I love that she gets excited to nurse and that it's something that I can do for her.  I love when she nurses to a soothed, lulled state...totally blissed out and happy and calm.   I love when she is silly and playful about nursing and thinks its funny. (P.S.  She has totally figured out that she needs to get inside my shirt and do something with my bra if she wants some.)  I love that a few minutes of nursing and cuddling can turn an irritable, needy baby back into my smiley, happy girl.  That being said, it's a lot of work.  It's not easy and it doesn't always go smoothly.   Sometimes she drives me crazy with the acrobatics and "popping on and off".  I spend a decent amount of my time remembering to drink my mother's milk tea and fenugreek (like I am right now), take my flaxseed oil supplements, eat my daily oatmeal with brewer's yeast, and ensure that I get enough pumping time to keep my supply up and feed her while I'm working.  All of the time I hate pumping.  It's very worth it to me, but I get why it may not be for everyone.  And that's ok.  I'd rather you be a sane, happy momma who doesn't breastfeed than a stressed out, unhappy one who does.  Happy momma is more important than breastfeeding momma.

5.  We don't practice attachment parenting.  I'm not against it, IF you can practice it, stay sane and happy and enjoy parenting, and it works for your baby.  Basically, if it works for your family, go for it.  It doesn't work for us.  That being said, Scout slept in bed with us for the first 6 weeks.  And I would have let her keep doing it if she would have kept sleeping.  I love my ergo and love wearing her.  But I like using my stroller while we are running and I'd like her to get uninterrupted naps and she won't sleep properly while attached to either Andrew or I.  I love breastfeeding her, and I'm planning on breastfeeding until we are done.  I don't have a time limit in mind, we are going to play it by ear and see what's right for us.  I have no desire to start cutting her off at this point.  Parenting philosophies, bought as a package, don't work for me.  Being so tied to a philosophy, that you won't try something else when you aren't getting the desired result, seems wrong to me.  I believe in taking the "best" from the philosophies that I encounter.  And by "best", I mean best for the whole family, at that moment in time.  I loved reading this article, prompted by the TIME cover.  Totally captured what I'm feeling.

1 comment:

Rachael Heiner said...

I really dislike this cover. Time is just adding fuel to the fire of moms not supporting other moms. Attachment parenting is great for some people. For some it's not. Also, I hate how they're both looking at the camera with no joy, and honestly no attachment/connection... which is sort of the point of extended breastfeeding, so I feel like the photo is not actually representative of the spirit of the whole thing. It's just frustrating.